Some Humans Just Sacrificed Their Jobs At CERN

Yes, despite what some people were clearly meant to believe, jobs are about the only thing being sacrificed at CERN recently. After a strange video depicting what was meant to look like a human sacrifice on its Geneva campus went viral, the European Organization for Nuclear Research (CERN) launched an official investigation to get to the bottom of it.

And while the video was quickly determined to be a prank – no doubt to mess with all those who think that CERN is evil and the Large Hadron Collider (LHC) is a “tool of the devil” – it has raised concerns about security on CERN campuses, not to mention the questionable senses of humor of some of its staff!

The video, which began circulating earlier this week, featured some disturbing imagery. Within the main square of CERN’s Geneva campus – which is home to the LHC-  several figures appear to be reenacting an occult ceremony. They are seen wearing black cloaks and performing rites in front of a statue of the Hindu deity Shiva – which is on permanent display at the complex.

The statue of Nataraja, the Cosmic Dancer, Dr. Aymar, DG of CERN, Dr. Anil Kakodkar, Chairman of the Indian Atomic Energy Commission and Secretary to the Government of India. Credit: CERN
Dr. Aymar, DG of CERN, and Dr. Anil Kakodkar, Chairman of the Indian Atomic Energy Commission in front of the statue of Nataraja, the Cosmic Dancer Shiva. Credit: CERN

The scene climaxes with the staged stabbing of a woman, and then ends with the one filming the scene (who appears to be recording everything from a hidden location) uttering some expletives and running off. In response, the European Organization for Nuclear Research issued a statement, claiming they would be investigating.

They also stressed that they considered this to be an “internal matter”. So while the Geneva police were aware of the incident, they will not be formally involved in the investigation. In response to a request for comment from the Agency France-Presse (AFP), a CERN spokewoman replied via email:

“These scenes were filmed on our premises but without official permission or knowledge. CERN does not condone this type of spoof, which can give rise to misunderstandings about the scientific nature of our work.”

According to this same spokeswoman, the people conducting the reenactment were likely staff. While they are not able to confirm the identities of those in the video, CERN’s security measures require that those working on their premises, of have access to their facilities, have official IDs.

The Compact Muon Solenoid (CMS) is a general-purpose detector at the Large Hadron Collider. Credit: CERN
The Compact Muon Solenoid (CMS) is a general-purpose detector at the Large Hadron Collider. Credit: CERN

“CERN IDs are checked systematically at each entry to the CERN site whether it is night or day,” she said. “CERN welcomes every year thousands of scientific users from all over the world and sometimes some of them let their humor go too far. This is what happened on this occasion.”

The statue used for the prank was none other than the Nataraja – a depicition of Shiva as the cosmic dancer – which is on permanent display at CERN. The statue was a gift issued by the Indian government in 2004 to celebrate the country’s long-standing relationship with the research facility.

Needless to say, there’s likely to be some hell to pay once the prankster’s are identified. While the prank does seem to have a sense of irony to it – as if its specifically mocking tho conspiracy theorists who think evil things go on there – the last thing CERN wants is negative publicity, or people conducting pranks that involve sacred artwork!

If you haven’t seen the footage, be sure to check out this snippet from NewsBeatSocial below:

Further Reading: The Gaurdian

16 Replies to “Some Humans Just Sacrificed Their Jobs At CERN”

  1. What’s wrong with you people? Science and fun can get well together. Get that stick out of your rectum

    1. Yeah, it was fuckin’ hilarious. I had to keep myself from laughing out loud in the middle of work. But still, people already think that shit is real. Now all we’ll hear about is bullshit from the idiots that think that science is the devil, and worse, the racists that think that it was all done in the name of Hinduism.

      1. Racist? Hinduism is a religion, not a race. Please stop using the word ‘racist’ in situations where it doesn’t apply. Unless you want to continue making yourself look like an idiot, then be my guest. 😉

    2. It was an embarrassment for CERN for numerous reasons. Also, if you can’t comment civilly, you won’t find your posts here anymore.

      1. And by “civilly”, you mean it would be better to make comments like the rightwinger bullshit by FarAwayLongAgo, right? Well, then ban me if you are on this side of the isle.

      2. No, all such comments are childish and puerile, much like the “but he’s doing it!” defense you’re making. And it for this reason that this comment thread is being closed.

    1. If they call it a “religion”, they will come out as heroes from this Political imaginary stress panic insulted propaganda strike against science. The intolerant socialist PC crowd doesn’t understand the concept of irony. They just want to kill kill kill everyone. Like they’ve always done, if you take a look at world history.

  2. The media should be happy I am not the manager at CERN because:
    I would just issue a statement saying,

    “We are aware of the Spoof/Satire. No damage was done to the facility.
    The right of the persons, whether visitors or staff, to Satire/Spoof conspiracy theories is probably protected under free speech laws.
    We do not see any scientific value in this Spoof/Satire, so we will not conduct any investigation.”

    At this point all free publicity value, sensationalism, etc. is gone, and there is no story.
    The attitude of just blowing off pranks as unimportant, usually makes the prank look childish.

  3. The Politically Correct slave crowd has no sense of humor. They are just intolerant haters. Very well known from their Soviet Union holocaust concentration camps in Siberia. Hate hate hate, jail jail jail. No room at all for any kind of tolerance for anything. This stuff is almost as bad as islam!

    1. Correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t the term “The Politically Correct slave crowd” kinda hatey? Not to mention other posts of yours where you completely eviscerate people you don’t agree with. Pot/Kettle, sir?

      1. No sir, it is the politically correct slave crowd that is “hatey”, here and now exactly as they were in nazi Germany. If you cannot take the ugly reality, then your life is in big danger.

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