Scientist Invents a Time Machine (*Wink*)

An interesting news item from Iran’s Entkhab news agency: Iranian scientist Ali Razeghi – who is also the managing director of Iran’s Center for Strategic Inventions — has registered a new invention of his own making: a time machine.

It’s doesn’t actually take anyone to the past or future, but produces printed reports with details about the future, and can “predict five to eight years of the future life of any individual, with 98 percent accuracy” according to Razeghi, as quoted in The Telegraph.

“My invention easily fits into the size of a personal computer case and can predict details of the next 5-8 years of the life of its users,” he says. It will not take you into the future, it will bring the future to you.”

Razeghi, 27, says he has been working the project for 10 years and this is the 179th invention he has registered.

The “time machine” would be a good resource for governments, he said, but he doesn’t want to launch a prototype at this point because “the Chinese will steal the idea and produce it in millions overnight.”

Razeghi said his latest project has been criticized by friends for “trying to play God” with ordinary lives and history. “This project is not against our religious values at all,” Razaghi was quoted. “The Americans are trying to make this invention by spending millions of dollars on it where I have already achieved it by a fraction of the cost.”

Of course, this has spurred articles about Doc Brown and DeLoreans, with hardly anyone taking this seriously.

19 Replies to “Scientist Invents a Time Machine (*Wink*)”

  1. That’s how they knew I was gonna lead the Army of the Twelve Monkeys into the pages of history before it ever even occurred to me!

  2. slap him and if he inquires then just say i thought you knew future so why didn’t you save yourself being slapped ?

  3. Too good… It will be good saving for govt of Iran they should not test any rocket or nuke further because they can foresee the success or failure with this amazing machine. 🙂

  4. Ali Razeighi should key in “Iran in 10 years”. I think he’s very afraid of what his machine will spit out. He should key in “N.Korea in 10 years”, ..then send it to that kid ruler President Kim Jong-IL. Add 1 more “L” to JONG-IL’s name, & you get his current state of mind “ILL”. …take care all.

  5. Then this guy should be able to predict his OWN future…wonder why he was not asked about that??

  6. What a coincidence, I was just talking to a flying pig about this very invention today. Me him and Big Foot think that this invention is going to change our lives!

  7. iranians are very clever and i think it is probable

    if this invention were true , iran might be the most powerful country in the world!!!

  8. It’s good to see that Iran has stepped up to the role that Soviet Russia used to take in science (I’m thinking of Lysenkoism as one example).

  9. Bah, an obvious hoax. Any fool knows that to read a subject’s future history with any accuracy requires the use of the subject’s tongue, not a fingerprint. Hmph, the man is obviously a shill for palmistry.

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